The evil curse of the leprechauns

Want a good reason to wear green on St. Pat’s day? What if I old you there was an old mysterious curse on anyone who dose not wear green today. It’s true. Those who don’t wear green on St. Pat’s day are cursed with the evil curse of the leprechauns. Now don’t get me wrong leprechauns ain’t evil but the ECOTL (evil curse of the leprechaun’s) is (as the name implies) evil on the most extreme level. It can stunt your growth and make your toes turn green and fall off. But the very worst consequent of ECOTL is that anyone who dose not wear green on St. Pat’s day can never see a leprechaun. It’s true some of you may say “well I’ve gone through a St. Pat’s day or 2 without wearing green and I’m pretty sure I’ve seen a few leprechauns since then.” Well guess what: you’re wrong. The leprechaun forefathers decided that if you didn’t have the courtesy to wear green on St. Pat’s day then you don’t deserve to see a leprechaun. Thus they placed a curse on all non-green-on-St. Pat’s-day-wearers. So if you ever want to meet me I hope you wore some green today.

A daily leprechaun trivial fact of much importance…

Green is our favorite color. I’ll bet you never guessed that.

A daily leprechaun trivial fact of much importance…

Leprechaun can not swim. This is I assume a relatively well known fact about us but I listed it here anyway because it is of the utmost importance. What if you were to see a leprechaun fall into the water and had never heard this? You would not know to save him and consequently he would die and the location of his buried treasure would die with him.

A daily leprechaun trivial fact of much importance…

There are in fact no female leprechauns. Baby leprechauns come from having leprechaun fathers. However not all mail sons of leprechauns are leprechauns.

Leprechaun identity theft.

Has someone stolen your identity? If so it was probably a leprechaun we’re known to do sneaky things like that and besides without some kind of identity we’d wind up working at 7-11 for .25$ an hour. But it happens that we are found out far more often than you’d think. nearly everyday some drunk leprechaun starts a street fight somewhere and without fail the bloody nosey cops come around and lock them up then said cops look at said leprechauns driving license and say “hey your not Lucy M. Canceil, you’re a leprechaun”. Then they stare at us (very hard so we won’t get away) and say “just tell us were your gold is hidden and you can go free.” And the leprechaun in question almost always responds “up your *******, fool” (you see there still partly intoxicated). Then of cores we disappear (a fun little trick that) and usually take the cop’s doughnuts with us. Lucy gets her identity back and we go steal someone else’s. This has happened to me quite a few times and it’s a hassle to go through for some stale doughnuts.

A daily leprechaun trivial fact of much importance…

Our preference to shoemaking as a profession is a common mistake. There was one family; the Flatedbacks who started a family shoemaking business (the Flatedback shoe company) but it only lasted for about half a generation. As far as I know that’s the only history of shoemaking in all leprechaunoligy (the history of leprechauns).

A daily leprechaun trivial fact of much importance…

Leprechauns are not all old men. This is a common mistake since our beards mature at about 8. But fact is the average leprechaun life expectancy is 53.4. But the majority of leprechauns that are seen in public are between 15 and 35. Older leprechauns are solitary beings and tend to retire in nursing-homes under new identities’.